John Sequeira


Monday, March 24, 2008
Abbreviated Parody of Paul Graham's 'Boss'

People aren't meant to have a spouse.

I saw some married people in the cafe the other day and something seemed wrong. They weren't passionate. I have a unique perspective on human relations, having been an eligible bachelor and active user of various dating websites since the category's inception over 10 years ago. Long term monogamous relationships are especially hard on people. Relationships are passionate early on, so why bother having one for longer than that?

Structurally, long term relationships often lead to kids. Kids are complex. And difficult to fund. Funding them with credit cards is stupid. For both reasons long term relationships should be avoided.

Now, it's not your partner's fault. I saw lions and monkeys in Africa one time. Monkeys don't get married, and neither do lions. They're both happy, so people shouldn't either.

Also, nonmonogamy is definitely something that can be learned. At, we help married people come out of their shells and find other people willing to overcome the straight-jacket of the married/long term monogamous life.

Having seen that happen so many times is one of the things that convinces me that being non-monogamous, at least in a small group, is the natural way for people to live.

Watching previously faithful, married, and, frankly dull people get transformed into passion-filled 'players' makes it clear that the difference between the two is due mostly to environment � and in particular that the environment in long-term relationships is toxic to people.

In the first couple weeks of working on their first affair they seem to come to life, because finally they're living hedonistically the way people are meant to.


Sorry, I couldn't resist.
4:10:23 PM      comment []  trackback []

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